“Clean Hands or Dirty Deeds: What’s Really in That Amish Apple Butter?” and Amish Teachers, educators or wardens?

Oh, sit back and relax, because I’m about to spill the tea on these outdated ideas, under-education control, and a whole lot of contradictions. Amish teachers, and the school they operate, are their own universe, set up specifically to keep those kids within the confines of the culture. So, let’s peel this back layer by layer.

Who are the Amish teachers?

Most Amish teachers are young women, mostly unmarried and fresh out of 8th grade, which is the highest-grade Amish kids are typically allowed to complete. However, this would not be completely true if we were going by state testing standards, which would make Amish kids at barely a fourth-grade level when existing. Some teachers may have a couple more years of education in a church-approved setting, but it’s rare.

Amish teachers are usually between 16 to 22 years old, though some older single women or even married women may teach if needed. Occasionally, you’ll get a male teacher, but it’s much less common. However, the Amish don’t allocate much by way of salary to pay these teachers, which is generally $400-$500 a month for a female, and up to $1500 or more for a male. Yes, of course this is acceptable in this patriarchy society, but lucky the Amish are so cheap and don’t want to pay anymore school taxes than they have to, since they pay Amish school tax and taxes for the county they live in, so it assuredly would get annoying.

📝 What are their qualifications?

None in the traditional, accredited sense.

Here’s what qualifies someone to teach in an Amish school:

They are Amish. I would like to say that they accept former Amish or other accredited teachers who may be accepted by the community, but that would be false. They do not. They attempt to keep the regular folk at as much distance as possible.
They have finished 8th grade themselves. Some teachers are as young as fifteen, possibly younger. It’s not your typical 8th grade curriculum, it’s an Amish curriculum, so don’t go thinkin’ they’re givin’ MLK or history of any kind any play, unless it’s Amish history, and not even that is in depth. Truth be told, most Amish know nothin’ of their own history, unless they leave or they get some second-hand knowledge from a getaway Amish who decided to return to the flock, but it don’t much matter to them. Whatever the bishop says is what they’ll believe, and they won’t go lookin’ for any biblical answers from scholars or the bible, that’s for chumps who ain’t Amish and have all the answers.
They are appointed by a committee, the elders and such, who get together and decide who is available and somewhat lucid enough to handle the task. Well, lucid might be a stretch, but whomever is available, and they can pay a pittance to, which won’t go directly to them if they are 21 and under, ’cause that money is cash-slapped into the gritty paws of the parents and that lowly paid teacher will never see a dime of it!
It goes without sayin’ that they teach according to Amish values. This is right, that is wrong. This is important, that can be ignored. This is who I am, this is who I’m not. You must know, they aren’t heavy on education in any traditional sense. They memorize more than anything, reuse books for many years, and the kids of course underline the answers, so they aren’t required to learn so much as they are memorizing the correct answer.
They are obedient, respectful, and willing to teach according to Amish values.
They can manage a classroom of mixed ages (grades 1–8 usually all in one room). This isn’t so much something they can do as it is something they better learn how to do if they are picked to be a teacher. Being chosen for something in this culture, such as teacher, preacher, bishop and so forth, is basically eenie meenie miney mo. You aren’t chosen because of skill; it’s more a draw name situation. A small, stoved-up, schoolhouse with a passel of unbathed, sweaty youngins’ all piled in together like sardines, and smellin’ worse.

That’s it. No teacher certifications. No college. No formal training. Just a lot of control rate memorization, and obedience training.

Can they whoop the students?

This one’s loaded, but the answer is an astounding, HELL YEAH! And, Do!

Yes, corporal punishment has been, and in many places still is, accepted and used in Amish schools. That can mean: Paddlin’ with a wooden stick or whatever they have handy, smackin’ hands with a ruler, makin’ students stand in the corner or on one foot, and/or public shaming.

It varies from district to district, depending on the bishop and the individual teacher’s approach. Some Amish schools have moved away from corporal punishment due to outside pressure or modern influence or claim to as a means to stave off any investigations, but many still use it quietly. The thing is, within the Amish, the lower the order, the grimier they are. You would think that the Amish wouldn’t have a Classe system, but they do, and they truly do not like others from communities who have and use more modern conveniences, they will say they’re going to hell too.

And the truth is, Amish kids are taught from birth not to complain. So, they endure it.

Is there oversight?

Almost none.
That’s the danger and the design.

Because of Wisconsin v. Yoder (1972), the U.S. Supreme Court basically gave the Amish community the right to educate their children however they want after the 8th grade. That means:

No government curriculum
No state-certified teachers
No school board oversight
No sex education
No mental health education
No teaching about bodily autonomy or abuse awareness

Which makes it the perfect breeding ground for abuse, ignorance, and indoctrination, not to mention trafficking. Wisconsin v. Yoder was passed so the parents could have their kids at home to work on the farm. They claimed it was because their kids would get too much influence from English kids in high school, and that might be true, but the real deal is, they want their kids to be uneducated, easier to control, and used for cheap labor. Why else were they born? To love? Honey don’t be crazy.

Back in the 70’s and before, agriculture was their hustle as it were many other folks, and that’s how they made their money, so the government decided to aid and abet them and allow them to graciously traffic their children for free labor, keep them ignorant and usually more susceptible to stayin’ in the cult because the less you know, the less you crave a better circumstance. The Amish, like many other landowners, aren’t working in agriculture as much these days. There isn’t that much money in it unless you are a huge operation, and they’re makin’ more money using the kids to work in construction, sawmills, roofing, and other dangerous jobs. And, don’t think that the girls have it easier when they’re forced into stranger’s homes in domestic servitude as a maid. Imagine, sending your 14-year-old isolated and vulnerable child into the home of a single man to “clean”. To them, that $30 is worth every penny of danger it imposes, and sexual abuse, ahhh, they’ll get over it, now gimme’ that money! Everything is about money! Ironic, as they’re claim to fame is to be humble, love the Lord and not have worldly things, it’s expensive as hell to be Amish, and if they weren’t flexin’ that slave labor of their children, there is no way in hell they could sustain the lifestyle they have, despite not having electricity. Look at it this way, as my husband told me, that when he was livin’ the Amish life, he spent more than $50,000 a year just payin’ a driver to take him to job sites, in a truck that he owned and paid all the gas and maintenance for. Could you imagine? So, when he bought his first truck for $70,000 and was bellyaching about it, I said, dude, technically, you were buyin’ a new damn truck every year that you were Amish, you were just givin’ that money to a greasy driver who was takin’ advantage of you. That is just one instance of stupid money it cost to live that lifestyle. Hell, ham sandwiches for funeral could cost $5-10,000. They ball out with that money their kids make them, and they don’t save shit! They are flexin‘ until all the kids are out the house, then whatever kid they have who decides to take on the responsibility for their parents will build them a smaller house on their property called a ‘Doddy House,’ where the parents will live and be taken care of by the kids who have already been “taking care” of them since when.

What’s really being taught?

Reading, writing, and math (usually limited to basic levels)
Obedience to authority
The glorification of their way of life
How to conform
No real critical thinking, imagination, or independent study

Creativity is stifled. Dreaming about being a doctor, pilot, or artist? Forget it. There will be no praise, but a lot of shaming. A parent will be more apt to humiliate their child on purpose because Amish parents don’t worry anything except makin’ sure the kids’ self-esteem is at the bottom of the wrung, it’s part of the program of mental warfare they employ to keep them sad, and the end game, Amish. Keep them Amish.

The underlying message is:
“Stay small, stay quiet, stay in line.”

💔 The real tragedy?

Many of these young teachers were abused themselves, either physically, sexually, or emotionally (Many times all of the above). And they go on to recreate the same system, because that’s what they know. Not out of malice, but out of deep, generational programming.

And because they lack higher education or outside exposure, they believe they’re doing the right thing.

🕯️ Bottom line:

Most Amish teachers are young, under-educated women.
No formal training is required.
Corporal punishment is still used in many schools. The kids will get their ass beat at school and then again when they get home. There will be no questions asked of the kids, because the parents believe what the teacher says and that’s that.
There is little to no outside oversight.
The education system is built to maintain obedience, not to empower or expand minds.

It’s not about learning.
It’s about containing.

And every time someone breaks that mold, steps out and starts asking questions, the cracks start to show.

The truth is, isolation doesn’t just hurt a child emotionally, it changes their brain, their self-worth, and their entire future. Let’s break it down, with science, psychology, and soul-level truth.

🧠 What happens to a child’s brain when they’re not encouraged to learn?

Brain development slows down.
The brain is like a muscle, if it doesn’t get used, it gets weak.
- Kids who aren’t stimulated (with reading, play, creativity, love) don’t build the same neural pathways.
- Critical thinking, imagination, and even language skills can stunt permanently.
The “curiosity center” shuts down.
Children are naturally curious. But when they’re punished or shamed for asking questions or dreaming?
- They learn that thinking for themselves = danger.
- So, they start to numb that part of themselves, sometimes forever.
Trauma rewires the brain.
Livin’ in fear, silence, or abuse floods a child’s body with cortisol, the stress hormone.
- Over time, this can literally change brain structure.
- It shrinks the parts responsible for memory, learning, and empathy.
- They can grow up with PTSD, anxiety, depression, or emotional numbness.

Isolation + Indoctrination = Intellectual Poverty

When a child is raised in a cult-like setting like the Amish, where they’re:

not allowed to think critically,
taught only what benefits the community’s control,
discouraged from dreaming…

That child grows up not knowin’ their own mind. And when you don’t know your own damn mind, you can’t trust yourself. That’s the most dangerous kind of damage.

So, what are the long-term effects?

Low self-esteem
(“If I don’t think like them, I must be bad, or I’ll go to hell.”)
Fear of success or freedom
(Because success means punishment.)
Lack of ambition
(Not because they’re lazy, but because they were never shown their worth.)
Mental stagnation
Their brain wants to bloom, but they were never watered.

❤️ But here’s the hope…

The brain is resilient as hell.

Even after decades of isolation or control, people can learn, grow, rewire, and reawaken their curiosity.

You just need:

New experiences
Safe spaces
People who believe in you
And permission to ask, think, and explore.

If you or someone you love grew up in a mind-numbing, fear-based culture, it’s not too late.
The brain can bloom at any age, but it starts with one brave question:

“What if everything they told me was a lie?”

🧼 Are the Amish taught about hygiene?

In general, yes, or maybe. Hygiene isn’t emphasized, or really, nobody cares about it. Teeth brushing, bathing, it’s something to be done at least every other Saturday before Church Sunday. However, their hygiene practices aren’t on the same priority list as you and I have. What is the word, thorough. They don’t prioritize bathing the same way that we do.

They wash, but often with cold water, especially in homes without plumbing. They may bathe once or twice a week, depending on the family. I’m not sayin’ they don’t squeeze in a ‘whore bath,’ but even that isn’t on their list of importance. They stick to dem’ rules, just in case somebody gets wind that they diverted the rules and will be looked down upon by others. They hate to be judged, unless they’re the ones doin’ the judgin’.

Children may not be taught how to clean themselves thoroughly, especially girls, who are expected to serve, not be seen. This was definitely an issue with my stepchildren when they visited. Bathing was torture for them. They were accustomed to wearin’ the same dirty clothes in the same dirty skin all day, sleepin’ in it, then gettin’ up and doin’ the day all over, but our house is different, and their father is no longer Amish. We wash our house in this house, not to mention we have Egyptian Cotton and Linen sheets, so we ain’t about to have swamp ass rollin’ around on them or underneath them, not today! Their showers were 2 minutes long and they thought soap was optional. Teeth brushin’ wasn’t somethin’ that was expected or encouraged in their Amish home, since half the time they can’t locate their toothbrush. Like, how in the sam hell does your toothbrush come up missin’? It’s abuse, but they’re Amish, so it’s fine. *Sarcasm*

Why is takin’ a bath such as issue?

No running water or modern bathrooms
Many Amish homes have hand pumps or use cisterns. Water has to be heated manually. That’s a lot of labor just to take a bath. The ones that do have running water do not have hot water, so everything is done with cold water, unless you fire up that Ashland stove and get some heat pumpin’ and jumpin’, and lucky for those who have the Ashland with a vat in the back, at least they have some hot water on demand, but that’s probably for instant coffee, not for ass washin’. Another expense to being Amish, now that I think about it, the stoves they use. They are expensive. We had one and paid $4000 for that bad boy! It heats the house as well as bakin’ the bread, so it’s useful, but you need ten men to lift it. Or, in our case, just us, but I’m freakishly strong, or else, we’d have been hiring help to get it in the house!
“Vanity is sin” mindset
Being too clean, smelling nice, or looking polished? That can be seen as prideful.
And pride = sin. So, some avoid anything that could make them appear “too worldly.”
Gender expectations
Girls are often taught to serve others’ needs first, not focus on their own bodies or health. This can lead to a total disconnection from self-care. They aren’t told what to expect from “Aunt Flo,” you know, that time of the month.
Cultural neglect
Some communities genuinely don’t place high value on hygiene education. It’s not malicious, it’s just generational ignorance passed down.
But that doesn’t make it okay.
Time! By the time you get up, do chores, get some grub and head to school or work, there ain’t time to warm water and relax in a tub. It’s not much for relaxin’ anyway, since they don’t get but a few inches of water, or scum if you’re the last to dip yo’ ass in that sludge, so if you’re picturin’ a bubble bath with rose petals alone with your thoughts and decompressing situation, you’d be way off base. It’s more utilitarian. Wash the parts you ain’t supposed to talk about and get on with the order of the day.

🚿 Are they allowed to bathe every day?

They have their rule book, the Ordnung, as it were, so never think for one minute the Amish are livin’ for the Lord. No honey, they are institutionalized. They are livin’ for the strict set of rules the bishop and other dudes in charge write in the Ordnung, and if you step out of line, they’ll shame you, shun you, and shit on you quicker than you can say, Woah, Nellie!

Not if the bishop finds out, and don’t let him find out you been washin’ yo’ ass on a regular basis, ’cause he’ll call a church meetin’ and you’ll be confessin’ your sins in the front of the congregation come church Sunday, alongside the masturbaters and bestiality participants, who regularly confess their sins, then do it again and again. Also… when you take a shower regularly, you might think you’re better n’ them, or have pride, and that ain’t good. Of course, they are ridin’ the shit out of that Amish brand, so they can jack the price up, so dumbass English people will pay if it says, “Amish Made,” which sounds a lot like pride, but I digress. Regular showers are discouraged, or…

They might be mocked or questioned for it.
It could be seen as “acting too English.”
Oh honey, let me tell you somethin’, bathin’ all them damn kids in an Amish household is a full-blown overtime job, and that’s if you’re lucky enough to have warm water and a tub that ain’t got rust in the bottom of it.
Most times, they haul out that old, galvanized tin tub, or a black, rubber feed tub used for animals, plop it right in the middle of the floor, and take turns. That’s right, same water, one after the other, and by the time that last poor soul climbs in, it’s more like sittin’ in a bowl of leftover stew than takin’ a bath. If you’re the youngest or the girl of the bunch, you better hope you ain’t got no open cuts, ‘cause that murky mess’ll infect you quicker than a hog gets to slop.
Now for as modest as they claim to be, with their long skirts and their bonnets pulled down tight, they sure ain’t in a hurry to give anybody the luxury of privacy. Why? ‘Cause you might start to enjoy it, and God forbid you feel good about anything. That’s practically a sin in and of itself, to have time to think in peace. Nope, ain’t gonna happen. But, here’s the real kicker: the Amish always hollerin’ about how they want the “English” to stay outta’ their business, talkin’ about their right to privacy and religious freedom, but they don’t extend that same courtesy to one of their own. Oh no. If you’re born into it, you belong to them, and they’ll walk straight into your room, home, your thoughts, and your soul, anytime they feel like it. They won’t knock first, because they have no boundaries unless you’re an outsider, and even then, only if it’s convenient for them.

Trust me, we had an Amish man come waltzin’ into our home unnannounced in the middle of the night like he owned the place. Not a knock. Not a “hello.” Just bold as brass, like we were livestock he was checkin’ in on. We called Kentucky State Police, you know, like good citizens are supposed to when somebody BREAKS INTO YOUR FUCKING HOUSE!!!! But, since the Amish dude claimed to be family, that was good enuff’ for the good ol’ boys in blue of Kentucky. Because when the Amish are the ones doin’ the crime, it’s like the badge don’t apply anymore, they work for the Amish. The police pick and choose what laws they want to enforce, and if you’re plain-dressed and pullin’ a buggy, you can get away with more than a dirty politician on election day. They treat these folks like they’re sacred cows but let me tell you, that ain’t reverence, it’s fear, ignorance, or flat-out laziness. Maybe a mix of all three, and that’s why people like us gotta’ speak out. We know what’s goin’ on behind them barn doors, and it ain’t all hymn singin’ and pie bakin’. What keeps goin on? I got much more where that came from, and it depends on the district and how strict the Ordnung (rules) are. In ultra-conservative settlements, daily-bathing is gonna’ be frowned upon. Because how dare you make a decision for your damn self, when it clearly says in that book to spare the water and spoil the daughters and that daddy who works all day sweatin’ his ballz off better keep a good amount of “Smegma on the WickerBill.”

Do they understand the importance of being clean?

Some do, but many are not taught why hygiene matters beyond a surface level:

Little to no sex education.
No talk of bacteria, infections, or feminine hygiene.
Girls may go into puberty clueless and ashamed of their own bodies.

So, what are the consequences?

Chronic infections
Dental decay (they don’t usually get regular checkups) and most have dentures. It’s not uncommon for those as young as preteen age to have dentures due to having rotten teeth pulled.
Embarrassment or shame around their bodies
Girls being too afraid to speak up when something is wrong down there, and since they are ashamed to speak on things because they aren’t taught their body parts and they if they know their parts and God forbid say the word “nipple,” then you are not a good little Amish kid, that is an abomination.
A smell that they get accustomed to, and they don’t give two damns if anyone else has a problem with it. Trust me, you’ll damn near pass out from the stench if you are biddin’ on stockyard animals on a busy day. Is that Alpaca worth a coma? Or at the very least, nausea?

And more tragically… a dirty child or young person who is neglected becomes easier to abuse, because they’re already taught to ignore discomfort and keep silent.

❤️ Final truth?

It’s not that the Amish choose to be dirty, it’s that they’re conditioned to believe suffering is noble and cleanliness might just be a worldly luxury.

Some of them want to be clean, but they don’t have the tools or support, or the permission to care for themselves the way they deserve. Like my stepson, who had become obsessed with bathing and brushing & flossin’ his teeth while he was with us, but when he went back to Amishland, the community of funky asses, they refused to let him brush and floss his teeth on a regular basis, hell, him and the other kids are lucky if they can keep a damn toothbrush. Like, how the hell does your toothbrush come up missin’, unless someone is deliberately takin’ it so they can fuck with your life. How dare he want to have good, healthy teeth? As a matter of fact, instead of gettin’ a root canal to save his tooth that insurance would have covered, she chose to have the dentist yank it out of both is head and his sisters. I guess she had dentures in her thirties, so all the kids might just as well, in Amish way of thinkin’. Which begs the question, has this culture of so-called traditions and barbaric behavior crossed the line? Should loyalty to your cult(ure) come before health, dignity, and truth.

Alright, now lean in close, sugar, ’cause this here is one of them things most folks won’t tell ya out loud, but I ain’t most folks.

When it comes to buyin’ anything made or grown by the Amish, especially food, you best be careful. Real careful. I ain’t sayin’ everything they make is dirty, but I am sayin’ they ain’t exactly out here wipin’ down counters with bleach and checkin’ meat temps with a digital thermometer either.

See, for the rest of us in the “English” world, we gotta jump through hoops just to sell a jar of pickles at a farmer’s market. Food handler’s permits, proper hand-washin’ stations, inspections, the whole nine yards. But for the Amish?
Nah, they slide right under them rules like a pig under a fence.

And honey, they got stomachs made of iron and a whole different definition of clean. Maybe it’s inbreedin’ or maybe it’s just years of gnawin’ on god-knows-what out of a chipped enamel pan sittin’ on a wooden shelf in a 90° kitchen, but either way, their guts can take a hit that’d lay the rest of us flat.

I’ve seen it with my own eyes, a hacked-up hog tossed into a rusted tub, no gloves, no sanitizer, just flys buzzin’ like it’s a hoedown. Then they’ll cut off a piece to fry, slap some on a plate, and gnaw on the rest through the week like it’s jerky. When they’re done? Give the leftovers to the dog.
Ain’t no waste, but Lord have mercy, that ain’t what I’d call safe.

And don’t let a clean, shiny mason jar fool ya either. Just ‘cause it sparkles don’t mean it ain’t crawlin’ with somethin’ invisible and ugly. Bacteria don’t care how cute the label is. And believe me, things like proper food storage and killin’ germs ain’t always high on their list of priorities.

To some of us, cleanliness is a sign of care and respect.
To them, it’s a luxury, or worse, a temptation.

So, when you see them booths at the roadside or those little farm stands with quilts hangin’ and jams stacked high, ask yourself:
Was this made with clean hands, clean surfaces, and a knowledge of food safety?
Or was it made between milkin’ cows and scrubbin’ a buggy wheel, or cleanin’ a shitty diaper with water they also used to rinse off a chicken?

It’s your stomach, darlin’, and your life, so don’t gamble it on a pie that ain’t been checked twice.

And I ain’t sayin’ this to be mean, I’m sayin’ it to be honest. ‘Cause somebody’s gotta’ look out for the rest of y’all, and I ain’t afraid to say what most folks just whisper.